See the Leaks
I recently read a quote that stopped me in my tracks: “They won’t see the storms we walked through, just a roof that never leaks.” At first, it sounded like a warning; to hide the struggles, to make life look perfect. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the real gift we give our children isn’t a flawless life, it’s showing them how we navigate life’s messiness — the storms and leaks — with faith and grace.
Life is messy. It’s complicated, unpredictable, and often exhausting. There are days when deadlines collide, when bills arrive faster than they can be paid, and when responsibilities stretch us in every direction. There are moments when relationships feel strained, when things go wrong, or when plans fall apart despite our best efforts. There are times when the stress of it all threatens to weigh us down. And yet, the temptation is always there to shield our children from these realities—to make life look seamless and orderly, as if we never struggle, never fail, never get tired.
Psalm 34:19 reminds us: “Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.” Life’s storms are not punishments, they are part of living in a fallen world. And children don’t need to be kept in a bubble where the world feels impossibly perfect. They need to see that storms happen, that challenges come, and that there is a way to face them without despair. They need to see grace in action.
Letting children see life’s leaks isn’t about burdening them with worry or anxiety. It’s about showing them how to respond when life is hard. When I face a complicated conversation, a conflict with a friend, or a season of exhaustion, I don’t pretend everything is effortless. I pray. I take a deep breath. I make decisions intentionally. I show them that even when life is messy, we can choose patience, perspective, and faith. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Watching someone face life with prayerful intention is a lesson far more valuable than seeing a perfect outcome.
The leaks of life aren’t always dramatic; they can be small, quiet, and cumulative. The laundry that never ends, the emails that keep piling up, the plans that derail, the conflicts that require patience, the disappointment of unmet expectations. Sometimes it’s tempting to hide the frustration or exhaustion, to shield our children from it so that life feels safe and easy. But there is power in allowing them to witness our responses. They see humility when we apologize after a misstep, courage when we make hard decisions, and faith when we trust God even when we don’t have all the answers. Romans 5:3-4 says, “Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” They are learning that life is not perfect, but grace and perseverance are possible.
There are moments when I pause (maybe even unintentionally) and let my son see me struggle with a problem, not to show weakness, but to model reliance on God and thoughtful problem-solving. Sometimes I pray aloud when I’m anxious about an upcoming decision. Sometimes I let him see me take a step back, gather my thoughts, and approach a challenge calmly rather than reacting impulsively, and sometimes I don’t (again, perfection is not the pitch here). Sometimes I show them that it’s okay to admit, “This is hard. I don’t have all the answers.” Each of these moments teaches resilience, honesty, and faith.
Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” What better way to train our children than by letting them see how life’s messiness can be met with faith, integrity, and grace? And even more so, that forgiveness and grace flow in abundance from our Heavenly Father when we fail to react with faith and integrity. Shielding them from every difficulty may make life seem easier, but it robs them of the opportunity to learn how to navigate challenges with a steady heart and a trusting spirit.
One day, they won’t remember the moments of struggle, the stress, the disappointments, or the problems that arose. They will remember how those moments were handled. They will remember the calm, the faith, the patience, the humility, and the reliance on God that they witnessed. They will remember grace in action. And that, far more than a life that looked flawless, will shape their understanding of how to navigate the storms of their own lives with courage, hope, and faith.
Letting our children see the leaks of life is an act of trust—trust in God’s provision, trust in His faithfulness, and trust that they can witness and learn from real-life faith in action. Life will always be messy, complicated, and hard. We don’t need to shield them from it completely. Instead, we can show them how to walk through it with grace.
One day, they won’t see the storms we walked through—they’ll see the grace we carried through them, and in that grace, they’ll find the courage to face their own storms with hope, resilience, and faith. And if God can sustain us through all of life’s storms and leaky roofs, how much more will He equip our children to do the same?
